"womanly" 19 going on "awkward girly" 13

how the hell am i supposed to have a fun time window shopping online when i do not like my own body right now, the stuff is too expensive, and though i'd like to somewhat fashionable, i would not like to look like every girl out there! oh gracious. clothes. i wish we did not wear them. man i go in stages or rather switch back and forth between what part of me i don't like at the moment, and what parts i feel good about. recently, i have felt good and then bad and then good again about my legs. see, the bottom halves are ok, but up towards the sky we run into the problems. at the moment i am satisfied with my voice when i sing along to all sorts of shit. and that is a change. oh but gracious! bacne! come on! i have not had that since like 13! never mind the fact that it might be related to my bathing habits, and the fact that i spend my days covered in a persistent layer oh sweat and chemicals. ahhhhhh body image. enough complaining! in fact i don't feel like computerizing now. so, this is farewell. i hope my hubby will not mind my "more to love" tendencies. also one last thought. i have this cut on my hand that has been drying and cracking more and more today.... and it hurts. silly kitten. more on that later i believe. woot. oh blogging.....